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Dating Advice for Couples & Singles

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Reciprocating!

The Basics of Giving Her Memorable

Oral Sex

By

Elizabeth Smith

You complain that she never gives you head. Well how often are you willing to go down on her buddy? That’s what I thought. Men love getting oral sex. So do women! That really shouldn’t be a big surprise. A lot of men just don’t know what they’re doing down there though, and I feel like I should do a bit of service to my gender by giving a few tips. Don’t feel bad, just like women sometimes need tips on giving good blow jobs, most men need a little guidance when going down there too.

The first piece of advice that I am going to give you is—now listen carefully here—the clitoris isn’t everything. There I said it. Don’t get me wrong, it does play a pretty hefty role in the act, but it shouldn’t be the only focus. Before you make the full dive, pay attention to the other sensitive areas. Try rubbing or licking the inner thighs. Tease her by licking and kissing the outer and inner lips of her vulva. When you do make your way to the clitoris—try a gentle sucking in addition to the other things you do with your tongue. It works wonders. And remember, clitoral stimulation should happen simultaneously with other sensations, like humming, or friction from rubbing with your mouth, or even penetration with the fingers. Listen to the moans. You’ll know when you’re doing it right. And for goodness’ sake, please don’t just repeat the same motion. It’ll make her go numb, and that’s not fun.

By no means is that a complete guide to cunnilingus. Oh so much more can be said on the subject. But it’s definitely a personal thing. Talk to your partner. More likely than not she will show you what she likes—what works and what doesn’t—and it will improve your technique and her experience.

So that should be a good starting point for the woman in your life who enjoys it when you spend a little bit of time down there. But what about those ladies who just aren’t too keen on it? Well there are several reasons. The most common thing I hear is that it is just too boring. Sorry guys, but if you don’t have the skills, we just may not want it. (All the more incentive to improve your skills. So you can pleasure your woman!). The other reasons tend to be more personal. She may not be comfortable with you being all up in her business because she may be insecure about the way she looks down there. If this is the case, be sure to let her know that you think she is beautiful down there. A boost of confidence can go a long way. She may also think she is dirty down there—even if she showers. This can also be a matter of confidence. Make sure to tell her you love her natural scent.

Of course, you should never try to force a woman to do something that she does not want to do. It may be a religious conviction, past abuse, or insecurity, but some women just don’t want oral sex. And that’s just fine. Respect her wishes. But for those of us who do enjoy it, please learn how to do it properly. And don’t forget to do it often!

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