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“Love is confusing! Love makes you not want the day to end but at the same time it makes you look forward to tomorrow.” ~ Tramaine Cavil
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When “I Love You” Isn’t Enough
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LoveFlu.com : Relationship Advice for Couples : Tips and Relationship Advice : Creating Love “In the Minutes”
Creating Love
“In The Minutes”
By
Tramaine Cavil
Even at an early age I was able to obtain a good sense of what people desired most in life. I initially saw it through the actions of others but soon, as if it were a rite of passage, I too proclaimed my earthly desires; and in small subtle ways began pursuing them. My first action was collecting bottles and cans around the neighborhood to purchase candy bars and sodas at the gas station down the street. My second pursuit came in the form of my third grade girlfriend; and my third came in the 11th grade with the most beautiful girl a 16-year old had ever seen. I call them the 3 pleasures; money, love and sex.
It’s a little after 3 am and I haven’t quite made it to the bedroom, even though the love of my life went to bed hours ago. Although my relationship is filled with love, my heart is filled with guilt. While I have captured love and sex, my pursuit of money and a better life for the both of us has kept me up late once again. It’s not just the late hours that causes my guilt, it’s the focus on the money and what it takes to achieve it that prevents me from loving in sufficient ways.
Although the three pleasures (money, love, and sex) are equally desired, the amount of work to obtain them varies greatly. Love and sex are earned through time and action but money is earned through time, action, time, and even more time. Get rich quick schemes are no longer seen as realistic and the focus is now on long hours in the office or at home building our own businesses. It’s no secret that a better financial life comes from hard work and sacrifice but I wonder, does love have to be the sacrifice?
I came across a website called, RichinMinutes.com, which focuses on the small things that you can do on a daily basis that will earn you money or save you money. The great thing about the ideas presented on the site, is that it only takes a few minutes for you to implement them. Hence the title, Rich in Minutes! This got me thinking. This concept not only applies to money but it also applies to love. Your earnings and wealth, just like love, are not created by the total overall effort that you put in, they are created “in the minutes” that you apply every day to reaching and sustaining your goals.
Love is an asset, and in order for it to earn interest and build value, it must increase in size. You can increase the size of your love…
- in the minutes that you put your lover’s needs ahead of yours
- in the minutes that you make them laugh and smile
- in the minutes that you share a tender and caring moment
- In the minutes you show that they’re needed
- In the minutes you show them they’re loved
Although financial goals are wonderful to have and rewarding once you achieve them, true wealth comes in the form of love. Money provides you with short-term happiness and things you want, but love provides happiness long-term and provides you with what you need and desire. The pursuit of the 3 pleasures is as natural to life as breathing, but the balance of the 3 pleasures is not a natural instinct. Just as money seems to disappear, so does love when it’s not managed properly. But remember, you can maintain it all, “in the minutes” you dedicate to making them grow.
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Article Summary
Creating love isn’t all about grand entrances and $500 dinners; it’s more about the hundreds of little things you do. Read our relationship advice to help you create love, “in the minutes” you set aside to focus on your partner.